Since You've Been Gone Read online

  “Are you staying too, Amy?” The words fall from my lips before my brain has time to stop them. I really wish I had more willpower when it comes to keeping my trap shut, but it’s always been one of my major downfalls.

  What does it matter if she’s staying, anyway? I guess I can always perv on Jake from afar, hidden behind my soon to be acquired, decent, opaque sunglasses.

  “It matters because she’s clearly got something going on with Jake, that’s why.” My wicked sub-conscience reminds me. Oh god, please don’t tell me that Amy’s our new recruit. That’d be just my look if she was, then I’d definitely be stuck with her all summer. Actually, now that I think about it, that would make perfect sense. If she’s our new recruit, then of course Jake will end up staying here all summer, so that he’s with her.

  “Nah. I’ll probably stay until the end of this week and then I’ll have to love you and leave you, I’m afraid. I don’t’ really want to mind, but I’ve got that dreaded thing called a day job that I need to get back to. I supposed we’ve all got to face reality sooner or later, haven’t we?”

  “That’s a real shame.” I smile politely at her and I can taste the lie as it leaves my lips. Bitter, exactly how I feel. Deep down, I’m really happy that she’s leaving and I don’t even know her. The little guys in my head are going crazy doing their own little happy dance. God, I’m such a horrible cow.

  “Well, we can’t always have everything, can we pet?” She replies. “I’m only really here to make sure Jakey boy settles in okay.”

  “Bloody hell, cut it out Amy. You’re not me Mam. Give it a rest will you?”

  “Haha. Don’t get all worked up now. You know she’ll be pestering me for updates the second that I get back home. There’s no escaping that woman. You and I both know it.”

  Someone’s obviously a mummy’s boy, then. The best ones always are, either that or they’re gay. The bottom line is, one way or another they’re taken. Stolen from us and all we can do is watch them from afar, knowing that they will never truly be ours. Sod’s bloody law, that’s what I call it.

  After spending most of the evening arguing with Fran, I find myself easily defeated as we arrive at Poison. I honestly didn’t plan on coming back here anytime soon. At least not until I had to anyway. Especially as this is the bloody scene where I made an absolute tit out of myself last night. To be honest, I’d be quite surprised if they even let me through the doors again.

  Yet, here I am, surprisingly ready to face the night head on, once again. I just hope that I don’t end up living to regret it. Who knows, I might just shock myself and make it through tonight without making an absolute tit out of myself.

  “Here’s hoping.” I silently pray to myself as I slowly raise my glass to my lips. “What the hell have you been slipping into my drinks?”

  “Moi?” Fran shouts, while holding her hands up before placing them on her chest, right over her heart to show me how deep my words have wounded her. She doesn’t half know how to fake an innocent, butter-wouldn’t-melt expression. “Just don’t knock them back as much as you did last time and you’ll be fine, treacle. I promise. Plus, we’ve all had a little too much excitement out of you for a while, don’t you think?”

  Now, I’d come out tonight with every intention of heading back to our apartment after a few celebratory soft drinks. I thought that if I at least showed my face due to it being my birthday, said a quick hello, then I would be on my merry way; yet now I’m about to step into Poison with a decent amount of alcohol swimming through my veins again, and that right there is a bloody recipe for disaster in itself. I have to admit that after my secret concoction of cocktails, I kind of feel like a new woman, but I know that I need to pace myself tonight. On the plus side, I can let my hair down just a little, without worrying about a certain person as we left Jake and Amy back at McDougals.

  To be honest, I’ve got absolutely no idea what those two have planned for the rest of the night. In all fairness, it’s got nothing to do with me, but I can’t help feeling jealous that she gets to spend her time with him and not me. It’s bloody crazy to think someone like him would be single anyway. Never mind being interested in little old me.

  It’s time to get over it Lucy, and fast. What’s done is done, and all that.

  I don’t know why I have developed this sudden and intense infatuation with him, but one thing that I do know is that it’s not healthy; not at all.

  “You having a good night so far, then?” Fran whispers into my ear as soon as we get comfortable on the dancefloor.

  I nod back, unable to speak loud enough to be heard over the music that’s pumping out around us. My voice is still hoarse and I’m petrified of losing it completely, so instead I take another sip of my drink. Extra lubrication always helps, or so I’m told, anyway.

  “See. I told you, didn’t I? Here, take this. It’s a present from that guy over there.” I look over to where she’s pointing and a dude, complete with a three-piece suit and tash waves back at me, and I don’t mean your average tash, either. No, this bad boy is a full on porno tash.

  Oh the joys.

  “Nice.” I say sarcastically, while shaking my head. “You have it. I’m good with this one. I’m trying to make this one last as long as possible anyway.”

  Nice and slow is my motto for tonight. A wicked grin dances on her lips and I automatically know that she’s up to no good. Fran’s always loved a free drink and she absolutely thrives off the attention that comes with it too.

  “Oh, I bet I could teach him a thing or two in the sack.” She squeals, while making a grab for my arm and squeezing it in excitement. Jesus, she’s like a bloody kid at Christmas who just found Santa downstairs eating all of her homemade mince pies. Dear God, this poor guy isn’t going to know what’s hit him. If Fran gets her own way, and she usually does, he’ll definitely be getting the corruption of a lifetime from her later.

  The poor bloke, she’s going to eat him alive.

  “Go easy on him, tiger.” I warn. One of these days, she’s going to bite off way more than she can chew, or end up in some serious trouble and when that time comes, she can’t say that I didn’t warn her. I know that I’m constantly nagging her about it, but Fran’s not the type of person to listen to anyone, especially when she’s got her mind set on something, or more importantly; someone. I guess she just needs someone to bring her back down to earth every now and again.

  “Now you and I both know that there’s no fun in that, Luce. Just look at him and that tash. I bet he’s a right animal in bed. Jesus, I’m going all funny just thinking about it.” Her eyes haze over and I’m a little bit scared of all the crazy shit that’s no doubt flying around in that bloody head of hers right now.

  It doesn’t take Fran long before she’s off, making a beeline for the suited tash dude. Bloody hell, I bet he thinks all his Christmases have come at once after sitting there, perched at the bar, eagerly awaiting some female attention. Seriously though, that girl has no shame. None whatsoever.

  Usually I’d be pretty annoyed that she’s ditched me for a quick fumble, but tonight I’m not really that bothered. Plus, I’m pretty comfortable with my own thoughts for company and it’s not like I’m really alone here in Poison. I know all of the staff here, and I should do too seeing as thought I spend most nights handing out flyers and special promo’s for them, ushering perfectly pissed party-goers through their doors and earning them a nice little fortune in the process. I can’t complain, not really. It’s not really a bad way to pay the bills that keep me here. To be fair, it’s like a constant holiday, one where you don’t have to worry about going home after a week or two.

  Unlimited fun, sun and scandal. Normally brought to you, courteously of yours truly.

  “Lucy.” My body stiffens as soon as I step out onto the balcony. Things sure get pretty stuffy in there, even with the air con pumping away. I guess it’s only to be expected when you’ve got a mass of sweaty, alcohol induced bodies grinding away against each other,
as they party and shag the night away. No doubt the majority of them forgetting any of it ever happened by the time tomorrow morning comes rolling around.

  “Hey… Again.” I say, hoping that my smile isn’t as fake as my voice right now. I don’t know what it is about her, but I just can’t get comfortable around her. I just feel on edge. I don’t even know the girl, but I’m suddenly like a raving jealous bunny boiler whenever I seem to be around her and that’s completely out of character for me. “No Jake.” I ask her before I can stop myself.

  Shoot. Way to go Lucy.

  “You like him, don’t you?” Amy looks at me and her perfectly preened brows struggle to move from her obvious bout of botox, yet her voice is calm. Is that amusement that I can see dancing on her face? Now this definitely wasn’t the reaction that I was expecting.

  “Fuckity- fuck-fuck.” I silently scream to myself.

  “What? Me, like Jake? Oh God, no. Whatever gave you that idea?” I stutter and I can tell that she’s on to me. I can’t lie for shit. I’ve never been able to, apparently I wear all of my emotions on my face. Maybe it’s time for me to think about getting a little hit of botox.

  What happens from here is completely down to Amy. Will she hit me? Pull my hair, or worse; throw me over this beautiful balcony, causing me to plummet to an untimely, premature death? Either way, I know I’ve got something coming my way.

  “Well pet, he seems to like you.” Her smile seems quite genuine, but what the hell would she be happy about it? Now, if the shoe was on the other foot and this was me, I’d definitely be throwing her over the bloody balcony, without so much as a hesitation.

  Her reaction really isn’t what I was expecting at all. Maybe they’ve got one of those weird, open relationship things going on, or maybe this is all some kind of crazy, sick and twisted trap.

  That’s it. I bet this is what’s happening here. I’m prepared to bet my life that she’s one of those crazy psychotic girls who use their friendly charm to lure you in and then…

  BANG… They slowly and painfully torture you for being slightly into their guy. Yes, that’s exactly why I am weary of her. I’m definitely not here to tread on anyone’s toes that’s for sure and I definitely don’t want to cause anyone any problems.

  “He’s outside.”

  “Huh?” My mind’s gone completely blank from trying to stay alert and focus on her next move; worried that if I don’t then that’s it, it’ll all be over.

  “Jake. He’s downstairs, outside somewhere.” Amy gives me one last smile and then proceeds to saunter her perfect, voluptuous body past me and straight towards the bar.

  Well, that wasn’t weird, at all.

  I guess now I just need to avoid Jake where possible. Scrap that, I need to bloody avoid him like the plague. No doubt Amy would be the type of person to keep a keen, watchful eye over me, just waiting for me to make a move, waiting for me to pounce so that she can get ready set her monkeys on me at any moment while she stands in her icy tower looking down on me.

  I don’t see or hear from Fran or Amy for the rest of the night, which to be fair, I’m quite happy about. Instead, I spent the majority of my birthday night out on the balcony, nursing my thoughts… Alone.

  Well, as long as you don’t count the bunch of pissed up stags that did nothing but promise me a night of wild and frantic passion. Apparently a night I would never forget. Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m all for a little bit of fun, but that kind of fun isn’t really my style. Especially when most of them most definitely, without a shadow of a doubt have wives or girlfriends, and even the possibility of kids waiting for them back at home. If only they really knew what they actually got up to while they were out here. If they did, I’m pretty sure that they’d all be on lockdown for a very, very long time, if not forever.

  I guess that’s really the only downside of being out here. Places like this really open your eyes and allow you to see people’s true colours, especially when you throw alcohol into the mix and trust me when I say that most of it isn’t a pretty sight. All inhibitions and any remaining dignity are well and truly thrown out of the window.

  Deciding that I’ve had enough excitement for one night, I grab my bag and finish the rest of my drink before making my way towards the exit.

  As I step outside and bask in the cool breeze around me, I allow my mind to wander to Hannah. My best friend and partner in crime.

  I miss her so much, but I know that I need to do this for myself before the dreaded day job kicks in and I finally have no choice but to face the reality that I have to become a responsible adult. This is the first year since we were four that I’ve actually celebrated my birthday without her and it feels really, really strange. Like I’ve lost a part of me.

  I mentally remind myself to give her a call tomorrow. My original plan was to call her earlier, but my bed sounded much more promising and then Fran didn’t exactly give me any time to breathe before dragging me out.

  “Hey Lucy, wait up.”

  I turn back whilst struggling to make my way through the sardine filled line outside Poison, only to see Jake running towards me. Now there’s just something about a guy in knee length shorts and a tight t-shirt that does something crazy to me and I suddenly find myself rooted to the spot.

  He looks just as good as he always does, and God, he smells absolutely amazing. My poor little fluttery heart aches a little knowing that no matter how much I like him, how much I refuse to admit that I want him; I can’t have him. He doesn’t belong to me and he never will.

  Who the hell said that life isn’t a bitch?

  “Hey.” I smile weakly back at him and all I want to do is melt into his arms. I’d really love to know how those big, strong arms would feel pressed against my skin as he holds onto me protectively.

  “There you go again, with those ridiculously wild and crazy thoughts.”

  “Yes, but they’re lovely, wild and deliciously crazy thoughts.”

  “Great, and now you’re bloody arguing with yourself. Get a bloody grip, woman.”

  “You heading back?” He asks.

  “Yeah. I think I’m gonna call it a night. I’m shattered and could really do with my bed. Plus, Fran seems pretty occupied somewhere upstairs.” No doubt in one of the toilet cubicles or something getting down and dirty with Mr Suit and tash man. I didn’t really fancy sticking around long enough to find out. I’ve been here enough times with Fran to know how it ends. It’s absolutely pointless and there’s no way that I would get anything out of her anyway.

  “Give us half an hour and I’ll walk you back?” He says, but it comes out more of a question on his lips. A small smile forms as he waits for me to answer him, causing that bloody dimple to appear again; completely immobilising me.

  “Don’t be daft.” I reply, trying my best to wave him off. Truthfully I’d love nothing more than for him to walk me back. There’s just something about him that makes me want to know more. Scrap that, I need to know more. He draws me in like a powerful drug and he’s bloody hypnotic. On the other hand, I don’t want to ruin his fun either. He’s clearly busy enjoying a night out too. Why would he leave that for me?”

  “Listen. Let me finish up here and I’m all yours. I’ll walk you back, okay?”

  My eyes fall to the ground. For some strange reason I’m unable to hold eye contact with him for long and that’s when I see the logo for Poison in his hands. Slowly, it all begins to click into place. “Wait a minute.” I exclaim. “You’re working here too? Oh my God. You’re our new recruit.”

  I know I sound stupid as everything begins to hit me all at once. Now I know what Fran and Jake were talking about earlier.

  “Aye. I guess I’ve got Fran to thank for it really, like.”

  He does? “So that’s why you’re staying.” A funny feeling flutters deep within my chest just at the thought. I actually get to spend the rest of the summer with him. Well, the rest of the summer perving on him from afar, anyway.

  Note to self; no more emba
rrassing moments for me. Well as long I can help it, but I know that’ll be a challenge in itself seeing how much of a liability I am. Deep down, I know that I shouldn’t be trying to promise myself things that are completely out of my control. If I do, I know that all I will be doing is setting myself up for another major fall.

  “Aye, but I’ll need you to show me ropes.” A small smile begins to dance on his face,

  “I’m sure you’ll be able to manage handing out a few flyers and shots, Jake.” I can’t help but laugh at him. Handing out flyers has got to be one of the easiest jobs going out here and this guy’s telling me that he’s going to need some help with it.

  I don’t feel as nervous around him as I did before. I guess I can put that down to the alcohol magically working its way around my body. Good old bloody alcohol; getting me in and out of the shit for years.

  “How about you come and hand some of these out with me then?” He nods his head towards the flyers in his hand. “The sooner that they’re gone, then the sooner I can get you home.”

  Anticipation spreads through my body like wildfire at the thought of being alone with him. I might be many things, but I’m not stupid. I know that nothing can happen between us as he’s currently taken, but the images that are beginning to play out in my head are different kettle of fish altogether. In an ideal, perfect world, there would be no Amy, he’d be single and this really could be the summer of a lifetime.

  A girl can always keep dreaming though, can’t she?

  “Well, it looks like that’s us done for the night, then.” I look over at Jake and sure enough, his hands are empty; as are mine. He didn’t really give me all that many to hand out and it has to be said that he definitely has a way with the ladies. There’s just no stopping him. It’s like he’s got some magnetic force when it comes to the female population. If only every night went as fast as tonight. One thing’s true, time really does fly when you’re having fun.